Life lesson 4

People always ask me,how I deal with things so easily. The answer is I dont,Im just good at hiding it.

Life would be a bliss if:

1) I can have this every moring when i wake up

2) Have this 

The Printed Word.

The exam is finally over,and I am hoping that everything will go well as planned. In the meantime,Im working for my project and hoping will get the reply for my application soon. I may say,this is my only way to keep myself occupy with good and beneficials things,having a conversation with a few friends whom had entered their clinicals somehow make me felt envy with them. They get to study with the staff,make themselves occupy with their work,meet the patient and at the same time comfort them. Reading facebook statuses about helping assist a surgery,standing 6 hours in the OR room,or the satisfy feeling of having the very first patient u handle got discharged,I can imagine that was a worth and satisfy feeling after all,but i know,in less than 2 months,ill be joining them and thats make me excited. Revising Harrison's Internal Medicine is what in my to do list for this week.

As we can see in this picture,that was me,I was out in today Newspaper for the new segment for belia in Kosmo newspaper. Sorry for a little bit of exagerrating story by the writer, but I shall thanks him a million because he wrote a good story about me.Mama,Abah and Uncle said this was a nice story.

p/s:I wanted to strive to be someone better than who I am today,not only describe in the printed word. I am not who I am today if Im not surrounded by a good friend. Please always remind me if I forgot. 

Life lesson 3

Life is short,eat your dessert first. The ice-cream will melt in no time :D
P/s:went to a very nice place to have dinner. Taj Mahal. The food tasting and cuisine was nice with a good company. Photos will be upload soon in facebook. Thanks mate! Exam,may i have all the luck in the world.

Life lesson 2

Be very careful who you open up to. Only a few actually care,the rest are just curious and dont care.
P/s:mari berusaha untuk neonatal resusitation!

Life Lesson 1

Life would be much easier when we stop over-thinking or over-expecting about everything or everybody.

Sibuk atau buat-buat sibuk?

Entri blog kali ni,terasa nak tulis dalam bahasa melayu kita. Dah terlalu lama menulis menggunakan bahasa penjajah sebagai bahasa pengantar,nak mencuba,apa rasa tulis pakai bahasa sendiri. Menarik. Mencuba sesuatu yang baru dan berbeza. Bukan nak plagiarisme blog Hafizuddin Jailani,tapi memang suka baca blog dia,dia memang punya gaya bahasa sendiri dan msg yg nak disampaikan pun dapat difahami. Dan apa lagi yang berbeza menulis dalam blog kali ni? Tulis directly dari IPad. Terasa kelainan touchscreen dia.
Kenapa tajuk entri kali ni sibuk/pura-pura sibuk? Teringat perbualan makan bersama seorang teman tadi. Dia tanya,fatin,now u sibuk apa? Dan i dgn tak pikir panjang ni jawab la,sibuk gile,tapi i pun tak tau i buat apa,nak kata online,tidak la,sampai mak pun tanya,kenapa facebook saya tak ada any new post sejak gambar sumpah koas. Asyik kawan-kawan je tulis kat wall awak. Tu versi mak saya,maybe dia harap saya masuk satu gambar setiap hari tunjuk kat dia yg anak dia kat sini sihat sejahtera.Alhamdullilah,mak saya sporting.
Berbalik kepada pertanyaan teman saya tadi,kenapa saya sibuk dan buat-buat sibuk sampai tak tau apa gossip terbaru kat jogja ni?
1)Sibuk mengejar mimpi. Apa mimpi tu? International Medical Conference. Saya tertamak haloba sampai apply ke banyak negara,anataranya Austria Annual End of Academic Year Conference May 30-June 3,Conference at Cambridge,Massachusetts and Harvard University,Toronto,Malta,Germany,France and Switzerland. Antara banyak yg diapply ni,harap lepas satu. Tak sabar nak buat oral presentation about my research.
2)Kedua,sibuk jadi wonderwoman. Kerja pagi petang kat lab biologi molekular tu buat gene restriction,target nak siap by end of this month so boleh proceed dgn editting bab4 dan 5 skripsi saya. Full paper and abstract is required for the International Conference.
3)Yang ni paling tak best dalam kerja saya-MENTRANSLATE the whole 74 pages of my thesis ke dalam bahasa inggeris,bak kata orang,the first language in the world. Ya dok?(baca dgn dialek penang).Sebab tu entri blog ni bahasa melayu tak baku,sebab boring translate bahasa.
4)Sibuk juga berlatih Futsal untuk pertandingan Sukan 3penjuru UMNO sabtu ni. Marilah beramai-ramai menyaksikan team Jogja bermain. InsyaAllah korang takkan dissapointed sokong cewe-cewe cantik ni kat gelanggang futsal tu. Tapi korang jangan salah,kitorang ni nampak je tough kat dalam gelanggang tu,sepak bola sana-sini,bunyi gedegang sana-sini,memang nampak ganas,tapi kami berperwatakan lembut di luar gelanggang. Haish, tadi pun,saya sangat bertuah,time defense dapat satu tendangan sebijik tepat kat kepala,concussion sekejap kat situ. Memang sedap la kan,hope exam nnt tak lupa apa kena buat kat pasien sudah. Untuk yg datang support,
Sambil tu boleh cuci mata sekali.Oops,cuci mata tu utk saya sendiri. Asyik tengok ikan kat
Jogja je,kena la hala umpan kat team yg datang nanti. Beruntung betul cik abang yg main volley tu!ada org da berniat dtg nak tgk dia main kan.
5)Sibuk belajar OSCE remedial. Minggu depan dah exam lagi. Rabbi yassir Wa la tu assir.
6)yang ni paling best,sibuk buat-buat sibuk sampai tak sempat online ym,facebook,twitter segala.. Ko memang LAME la fatin.
Kalau masih ada masa nak pergi spa 4 jam mandi lulur bagai,treatment rambut 2 kali seminggu kat salon,menicufe,pedicure,tengok romantic movie kat wayang,lepas tu balik layan series kat laptop tu sibuk ke buat-buat sibuk?Ada masa nak layan gossip sana sini tu sibuk ke? Sibuk boleh update blog tapi mesej kawan sendiri tak reti nak balas tu sibuk atau buat-buat sibuk? Tepuk dada tanya hati.

Dream High!

I had started on my phase 2 research at Biology Molecular Lab. And I had keep this to myself for quite a long time,maybe since last year when I had already started being serious with this research and gene amplification. Since I had 2 months of free time regardless Im not entering coass this April,I applied to participate in International Medical Conference. I did make applications to a few countries that held the conference between May-June this year.

This is the first application,under student scientific research club,the congress will be held on 6-8th May 2011 in Instanbul University Cerrahpasa Medical Faculty.

I hope they accept my abstract since i had already made the payment of 100 euro to participate for this.

I made application for Prague 2011 in Chezh republic. This conference will be held on 21st-24th june.

and a few more applications. I hope my abstract will pass for one of the universities i applied. Than i can make mummy and daddy proud of me,and the country too. Bismillah. Thanks daddy for the credit card to make the payment.tehehe :D.

p/s: Dont tell me the sky is the limit when there are footprints on the moon.

I had many things to blogged about,but i just couldnt find the suitable time. I even listed all the title to blog about =.=. My main goal this time,settle this yudisium,pack and home.

Junior Masterchef!

Junior masterchef is the new TV series that introduces the new budding chef that age 8-12 years old. One of my favourite TV show during my leisure time,and maybe because me myself have a very big passion for cooking. Sudin facebook status trigger me to write about desserts i love. The triggers,smiles and laughed,all in one when i read the status, I even googled for those dessert recipes in junior masterchef TV series..

Yes,desserts do entertain me the most and the one which I looked forward for before my meal.

found this at R&B Grill

cooked by myself-puding mangga

chocolate house

chocolate house

 this is not a dessert but a rose came with goodluck 

wish for my pendadaran

I had the night pendadaran is over,a suprise treat from a friend.

And this are a few dishes I cook during past weeks,instead of the busy schedule,I still want time to do thing Im passionate about,maybe i wasnt the master chef,but I at least try,that matter the most.

sambal udang with petai n daun ulam raja.

nasi paprik ayam and daging.

ayam masak merah.

mixed vegetables,tempe goreng and lumpia goreng.

Maybe not as good as those masterchef,tapi bolehlah untuk makan sendiri kan,bukan bagi org makan,except housemates. Salute to those junior masterchef. Im learning to make the pasta from them. Till next post.

"be there when people need you,because in order to have friends you must first be one"

let's sing 2,3 and 4.

The smell of black coffee had already filled my room as early as 4am in the morning.
Thesis done,publication paper is done.
One by one down,but now,its a matter of time running very fast when i had a lot in mind.
But what make my day the most is: papa n mama coming again.(lets count backward now)
Im glad to have such a wonderful,caring and supportive family(where I am somehow didnt get it from most of people here-some being too selfish with themselves and some being so ignorance.)
and the mood booster of all was:Im gonna wear my new shirt today which i went hunting during CNY holiday!
Im best at my retail theraphy.(if u read my twitter ;p)

To those celebrating CNY. Happy Prosperous year. Its the year of a rabbit,its time for 'playboy' to shine :D

it quite a day

I hope my thesis will do just fine.

p/s:Suatu yg membuat kita marah,itulah 'guru' yg mengajar kita erti sabar. Suatu yg mengecewakan,itulah 'guru' yg mengajar kita erti redha. Suatu yg manis, itulah 'guru' yg mengajar kita erti syukur.Suatu kesempitan waktu,itulah 'guru' yg mengajar kita menghargai masa.Suatu yg sedikit,itulah 'guru' yg mengajar kita erti berpada-pada. Allah menjadikan hidup penuh dgn panduan,semoga manusia berubah.

Don't be so quick to pass Judgement,you never know what someones going through! 

Dissapointed

There are just too many two-faced people nowdays.
and too many dissapointments.


i build a wall within myself,just to see who brave enough to brake it.

                                      im wishin u'd come sweepin in  the way u did before
                                               and i wonder if i ever cross your mind,
                                                    for me,it happens all the time.

#1 reason

The only thing why I hold so strong to the memories,is because the memories didn't change,when the person changed.Its like capturing a picture,u captured the memories and moments of it,and when one day u look back at the picture,U will spontaneously smile looking at it.

Im doing just fine.

My Handbook of 2011

For Health

1-Drink plenty of water

2-Breakfast like a King,lunch like a prince and dinner like a beggar.

3-To live with the 3E's-Energy,Enthusiasm and empathy

4-Make time to Pray

5-Play more Games

6-Read more books than I did in 2010

7-Sit in silence for at least 10 minutes each day

8-Take a walk,10-30 minutes walk daily

9-Share a smile with a friend who dont put a smile on their face.

For Personality

1-To not over do. To keep my limits.

2-To not take myself too seriously as no one else does. Why so serious?

3-To dream more while Im awake

4-To envy less. Envy is a waste of time. I had already had all I need.

5-Forget issues of the past. To not remind myself or my friends about their past mistakes,because it can ruin present happiness.

6-Try to not have hate to others. It creates Negative energy.

7-Smile and laugh more

8-Agree to disagree

For Society

1-Call Family more often. Reply long text messages :D

2-To try to give something good each day.

3-To try making at least 3 people smile each day

4-Care less about what others think a bout me.Its none of my business,it a waste of energy.

For my Life

1-Do right thing

2-Spend more time with God,as He heals everything.

3-No matter what I feel in the morning,i will get up,dress up and show up.

4-To thank God every morning when Im awake.

the best person for you is right beside you :)

Hello 2011,goodbye 2010.

In my blind pursuit of seeking the deeper meaning of what life truly holds, a challenge I have brought upon myself since God decided to place me at this side of the world, alone with my equally clueless friends -the only thing that separates us from one another is our maturity and our perspectives.

Human to human interactions - 

friends and romantic flings - I call it flings, you can call it relationship if you want - but I've lost all faith in that "R" word a long time ago. I'm impaired - impaired to restrict myself and stop myself from giving too much in something that gives me too little. I'm scared of getting hurt again, and I'm terrified of falling into another person who doesn't necessarily appreciates holding my heart in his hand. I wish, I don't wear my heart on the sleeve, I wish I'm less like me and more like any other girl - because the truth is, I don't know how to handle it. How much are you suppose to give and how much are you suppose to expect from him? Why does it feel like I'm always giving but when I expect a little, no matter how little, it seems to be my fault that I had expectations. Its really confusing.

I could be wrong. I could be so wrong about all of these.

Maybe, the person in question is reading this.Maybe He doesn't care anymore,like I did. I care less about him. and I can say somehow,the feeling was like this "He never really existed in my life' , & all that left was memories,nothing much. 

And I can laugh reading back at all my blog-post with 'him' in the entry/something that revolves him n how happy i was back at that time.

So to the person in question,thank you and goodbye! ;p.Thank you for making my life worth living in the transient period and thank you for breaking my heart,you made me found who I am. and goodbye to 2010 memories of us. 

Sorry if I painted a wrong picture about him,but as far as I knew him since years ago and till now,He is a great guy and an awesome friend. I am not without faults, and he's only human.

Sometimes, we make the wrong moves, moves that we're unable to undo, and to live with regret is not to live at all.

 I used to felt lost, like I met a dead end, I didn't know how to face tomorrow, or the next very second of my life. So I went to God, I prayed and hoped that despite all the crap I've done, all the sinful indulgences I ignored, He'll let me see the light at the end of the tunnel.

I learned, In this uncertainty of our lives and the chaos that is our hearts and minds, one thing is for sure, when the rest of the world seems to ignore you, family and God won't. All you have to do is seek for Him and He'll come to your aid. I may be a leg bearing, "free hair"-ed girl, but that much I know and believe in.

Nobody has everything in the world.

God will always take something away from you, if He wishes to give you something.

He took something from me,but He gave me more than what I wish for,best friends.

I've met and had amazing friends who I know I can depend my life with over the years, there aren't many in this world. So it takes a little bit of searching.You get to weed out a bunch of bad fruits for a golden apple.

I knew I had fareez whom always there for me even sometimes he is left clueless. Sudin to listens and give advices, Ana to gossips,and Faizal for late night phone calls. What more can I ask from them? None.

To the bestfriends,thank you for simply being there. simply making me stronger.

I give something back every year - like my clothes, shoes and things to the needy. Giving and helping may reduce the whirlwind of your mind, I was told. So hopefully getting rid of things I don't really need may also un-clutter my head.

I learn a lot from Papa and Mama,untuk berbagi rezeki,with the needy and everyone. Because sharing what u have wont coz u to have a little less but it making u to have more.More love and more Joy.

I learn not to  be mean to anybody, including to those who were mean to me. If you must, then just walk away.

I learned a lot in 2010,a lot which it teaches me to stand up and Grow up.Some memories are bad,but overall,I live my life with Joy and Having all the close friends I mention above. I learn a lot too about people,where someone can simply come to you and ask you to leave your bestfriend whom had always there through thicks and thins. and all you have with that particular someone was just Fling? as simple as that.

I gained a lot too in 2010 where having more responsibilities made me think and become a much more I can say as 'mature person',where handling a car and driving all alone & to simply take care of ur own need.To wake up as a daughter,student and a person is simply sometimes a hard thing to do. Where your parents are far away to tell you whats wrong and whats right.And all they can do is to Pray for ur safety in another country.

Iim growing up and I knew,Im better now than back than.

Last but not least,for my every wrong doing,for all the heartaches I caused,

for the reactions from my actions - I can never perfect. I made mistakes.

From the bottom of my heart,I am sorry

because it takes both parties to forgive and get over it. But if that's not possible, move on.

For the new start of 2011,

I hope you search deep within you,everyone , to find, and pray for that strength to live, to wake up from sleep every morning, and have the will to lift up your head upright. When being happy seems so out of reach, any strength and power would do, just enough to.. live. The world demands you physically, responsibilities, and endless works and deadlines, life goes on, and even it sucks.

Happy New Year,2011 and Thank you 2010.

Sincerly,Fatin Maziah Bosro